my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
