And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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