4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize