I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
