69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
