i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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