All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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