Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
