My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
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