Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
