and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize