Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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