You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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