If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize