break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
