how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
