a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I didn't notice because vodka
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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