I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize