I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Randomize
