Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
