very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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