Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
third nipple confirmed
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
