Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize