Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Randomize
