Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
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