If i come over, it means nothing
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
