i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
