i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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