fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize