If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
