Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
