I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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