I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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