I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
