Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
