Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
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