You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize