Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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