Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
