That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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