on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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