first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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