i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
