im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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