I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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