pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
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