SEEEEXXX PLEASE
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
