How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
