So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
