You really coming over, don't trick.
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Randomize
