can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
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