this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
