Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
